Why I Purchased A Large Diesel SUV

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You can’t cross the identical river twice. The river is at all times flowing and what you outline as you is consistently altering. It’s not the identical river, and I’m not the identical man. I’ve lengthy held an anti-SUV stance and vowed I’d by no means personal one, however I assume issues change. I hate to confess it, however this Porsche Cayenne is a fairly good every day driver. I’ve given up my wagon, exchanging the keys for a decade-old German hauler. I’ve turn into the factor I’ve campaigned towards for years.

Let’s rewind a little bit bit and clarify how I ended up right here.

Again in 2019 I had a grand plan to renovate a little bit Scamp journey trailer for nomadic cross-country dwelling. Then 2020 occurred and we determined it wasn’t the perfect concept to journey and successfully reside out of truck cease bogs. A short time later I moved throughout the nation for a job. After dumping far more cash into that mission than I care to confess, finally we tried utilizing the Scamp for a handful of weekend camp journeys, and it proved itself simply means too small for our wants. Scrap that concept, transferring on.

Image for article titled I Have Become The Thing I Hate: Why I Bought A Big Diesel SUV

Picture: Bradley Brownell

As 2023 got here to an in depth, my spouse and I made a decision that it was most likely time to revisit the cross-country journey concept, however we’d completely want one thing greater. A much bigger camper—positively one with a rest room and a queen-size mattress—would imply the Buick Regal TourX’s 1,000 pound towing capability would not do. No, we wanted one thing that might comfortably haul no less than 6,000 kilos, which just about precluded something however an SUV or pickup truck.

We haven’t purchased the camper but, however we’ve got narrowed it all the way down to a handful of fashions and we’ll search for whichever is the perfect deal. Initially I wished to do the cool-guy factor of getting an Airstream, however as a result of I need to have the ability to deliver a bike alongside for the journey, that’s a no-go. Ugly ass toy hauler it’s.

Image for article titled I Have Become The Thing I Hate: Why I Bought A Big Diesel SUV

Picture: Bradley Brownell

Anybody who is aware of me realizes I’m a simp for Porsche, and though I’ve groused in regards to the Cayenne for years, it’s positively nonetheless the perfect automobile in its class. Contemplating towing capacities, gasoline financial system, and long-term worth (issues I don’t usually contemplate when shopping for a automotive,) and weighing them towards cool-factor, the Cayenne was just about the one factor on our procuring listing. I don’t suppose I’ll ever be a pickup truck man. After a brief search, we discovered a black/black instance regionally with 75,000 miles on the odometer for the princely sum of $21,000. I wished a colour, nevertheless it appears these solely got here in white, black, or silver.

From the off I knew it might be unimaginable for me to go away effectively sufficient alone. I don’t do inventory automobiles, and instantly set to modifying our new-to-us Cayenne. It wasn’t fitted with a tow package deal from the manufacturing unit, so I purchased a used hitch bumper and bolted it on. I had the native seller set up a trailer brake controller and program the trailer mild management unit to speak to the automotive. The choice sheet for this automobile included the GTS-style gloss black exterior trim package deal, which made the chrome fender and hatch badges look completely misplaced, so we ordered recent black badges and a black Porsche emblem for the hood.

Image for article titled I Have Become The Thing I Hate: Why I Bought A Big Diesel SUV

Picture: Bradley Brownell

I can’t abide inventory wheels on something, and there are extremely few OEM fitment wheels that I didn’t hate. I’ve had this set of seventeen-inch custom-finish Braid Fullrace T Dakar Beadlock B wheels kicking round for a little bit over a 12 months. They have been supposed for a unique mission that fizzled out, and fortunately clear the brakes of a Diesel, so I bolted them up. This would possibly sound bizarre to some, however I’ve owned a couple of dozen Porsches over the past ten years, so my storage is virtually packed to the rafters with 5×130 fitments.

Akron, Ohio’s personal Mickey Thompson makes a chunky Baja Boss tire that’s the very same rolling diameter because the manufacturing unit 21-inchers I took off. I’m not saying I purchased a complete Cayenne as a result of I already had wheels and tires that might match, however that’s not not the explanation.

Image for article titled I Have Become The Thing I Hate: Why I Bought A Big Diesel SUV

Picture: Bradley Brownell

On the finish of the day, I’ll personal up and admit that I used to be mistaken. The Cayenne is fairly good, and I recognize having it within the steady. These midwest roads are a little bit too tough to drive a sports activities automotive each day, and it’s good to have a little bit of floor clearance and thick sidewall. We’re in the course of some house renovation initiatives, and are available spring we’ll most likely be seeking to hit the street, so this huge black device does the job fairly effectively. That it commonly returns 35 miles per gallon on the freeway [I’ve seen as high as 43!] is fairly spectacular, too.

I’ve just a few extra modifications I’d like to complete up earlier than I can name this mission “achieved” however I’m not going loopy with this one. I gained’t put a raise equipment on it, and I’m not going to wrap it or get it painted. I simply need a good stable automotive that my spouse and I can drive for just a few years, tow with out points, and infrequently tackle a light-weight off-roading journey. Thus far it seems to be like this can accomplish that.

Perhaps y’all have been proper. Perhaps SUVs are fairly okay.

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