Federal Killjoys Inform States To Cease Placing Jokes In Freeway Signage

An arm inside the U.S. Division of Transportation referred to as the Federal Freeway Administration has declared that joke time is over. New steerage has been issued on interstate traffic-safety messages: “Indicators ought to keep away from language that makes use of pop-culture references or humor.” These DOT punks say the indicators might be distracting and will solely be used for pure info supply. There’s nothing the feds can’t take the enjoyment out of, eh?

Apparently these jokey indicators with standard tradition references have been bothering the freeway overlords for just a few years now, as a draft of the pending replace to the FHWA’s Guide on Uniform Visitors Management Units dates again to 2021.

“Messages with obscure or secondary meanings, equivalent to these with standard tradition references, unconventional signal legend syntax, or which can be supposed to be humorous, shouldn’t be used,” the draft says.

As a substitute of Massachusetts’ well-known “Use Yah Blinkah” signal, the feds counsel the signal ought to as an alternative learn “UNBUCKLED SEAT BELTS FINE + POINTS.” Wow, boring! 

States argue that their humorous indicators are extra memorable, pointing to a 2020 Virginia DOT research proving they commanded essentially the most cognitive consideration in comparison with extra generic security signage. The feds’ rebuke claims that is precisely the issue. The indicators are sometimes befuddling to individuals who don’t perceive the reference, inflicting them to take extra psychological vitality off the act of driving. They’re calling you silly, mainly.

In a world that’s more and more crushing the spirits of common on a regular basis People, we are able to’t even be allowed the easy pleasure of a mediocre dad joke cobbled collectively by a state DOT sign-writing committee in the midst of our car-centric hellscape commute to goddamn work. What subsequent, are they going to ban morning zoo commute hour radio exhibits as a result of they make dumb jokes, too?

States could have two years to implement all the modifications within the 2024 version of the guide, together with this discount in cheeky roadside signage.